We’ve all heard Whitney sing it: “you give good love to me baby”. I don’t know about you, but I always thought those lyrics to be redundant. Isn’t love supposed to be inherently good? However, as some of you may have found out the hard way, love can be bad. When love becomes perverted by motives and selfish thoughts, it turns bad. So, it does beg the question: what exactly is GOOD love? Ms. Houston was probably singing about the ooey-gooey feelings that have become the norm in most secular songs and movies. However, she does strike a chord when she croons “and you know just what I need”. Good love is not about you, it’s about them. Remember, love is…..patient, kind, long-suffering etc. In summary, good love is sacrificial.
God’s word teaches us that love is about the receiver not the giver. Jesus showed His love for us by dying for us. He didn’t feel like it. He was terrified at the thought of being crucified (see Luke 22:42) but he did it anyway. 1 John 3:16 says: This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters.
Here’s a thought; when you show love, what is your motivation? Is it more about you or the person you’re giving love? Do you expect something in return? Are you doing it so other people can pat you on the back? I’m always baffled by people who give gifts knowing full well that the recipient will not like the gift but they chuck it up to “well, it’s the thought that counts”. Yes, the thought counts but obviously the thought is skewed more towards the giver than the receiver. Good love is loving someone how they want to be loved.
So LoveKulture citizens, here’s an idea. In this month of February (the month of love), let’s try something different. Ask yourself, what are the top two ways that your husband/wife/significant other/friend/co-worker/enemy/whoever, really feels loved? What is his or her love language? Is it when you perform an act of service, like cleaning the bathroom or washing their car, or is it when you give them a gift or do they prefer hugs and kisses or a hand written note or a phone call (PS: If you don’t know, find out or ask them, don’t just wing it!). Next, for the month of February (yes, all 29 days not just on the 14th) do them. Choose to do both each day or alternate days. If there’s one you hate doing more than the other, do that one more (remember, it’s not about you!). Let’s see what happens when we give good love.
Happy good loving month!
PS: Come back and tell us how it goes. We enjoy love stories here at LoveKulture.